Not an ordinary sunrise...

Time really has been getting away from me recently. I keep meaning to blog and then I don't. It's all about being absent. A few weeks ago I had a friend over for dinner. Three of us (my girlfriend, myself , and my friend) sat at the dining room table over empty plates and sat and talked. No rushing around to GO somewhere else, no needing to BE anywhere. We just were present in the moment. Talking about everything and nothing at the same time. We all had a-ha kind of moments at the same time when we realized that we really were all just enjoying the now... and it was a wonderful feeling.

Too often I find myself lost...absent if you will. It is so easy to be absent in your own life for whatever reason. Me, I worry, I fret, I try to control the uncontrollable... and in that lose the now.

Which brings me to my sunrise. The one this morning.
I work second shift. 2pm to 10 pm. Tuesday to Saturday. I cannot even tell you the last time I was awake, early enough to watch a sunrise. When you have to be functioning at work until 10 at night, being up early enough to watch the sun come up, makes for REALLY long nights at work.
My girlfriend and I drove down to Baltimore Maryland yesterday afternoon to see the Indigo Girls play at a local bar at the inner harbor. We stayed at a hotel 6 blocks from the bar. We stayed out late, drank a few too many beers, caught a ride back to the hotel and managed to sleep for a few hours.
I knew I had to be at work today, I knew that I should get as much sleep as I possibly could. In spite of needing sleep, I set the alarm for 6 am and watched the sun rise from the 21st floor of the hotel. Baltimore is a beautiful place. Anywhere is beautiful in the bright red glow of the sunrise. A small knock on the door indicated room service arrived. Breakfast in the red/orange glow of the sun. Window open to the noise of the city waking up. Sleepy conversation with the love of my life over too small cups of coffee. I said "They forgot the sugar, but lets not call for any. " She said "ok" and smiled. we were there, just sitting, in the now of THAT moment, enjoying the sunrise.

It is 7 pm almost 12 hours since that sunrise. I'm exausted, I am tired and NOW I am smiling.

At least...

... I didn't wait an entire week to make a new post.
Although I'm not entirely sure what to write about in this one.
I just wanted to be sure that you all didn't think I'd forgotten about
you. *waves*

So I have come to the conclusion after trying to eat healthy
the past few days (we wont mention the late night cheeseburger last night)

So eating healthy. I am not a rabbit. I cannot survive on salad and veggies
alone. I need substance. I need meat. Doesn't have to be read meat
chicken is fine. ( don't eat pork and don't like fish , except tuna)
ya can only eat so many cans of tuna also. Once every few weeks for me.

So yea, I'm freaking starving.

End of message.

Have a great day! Happy Spring!

Happy Tuesday

...er, Wednesday for you.

I said (Jazz) that I'd be back on Tuesday and here I am!
Florida was great
the weekend FLEW by (perhaps it had something to do with the copious
amounts of Malibu bay breezes I was drinking.
For those of you who might not know whats in that drink its

Malibu (or some other coconut rum) pineapple juice and a splash of cranberry
just enough to make it a pink color.

Got home late Monday night spent my few morning hours yesterday
doing laundry. Still have two more loads and I will be all caught up with
the piles that have formed in the three days it took me to finish the laundry from
last week... its never ending. I cannot even IMAGINE what it would be like
if there were more than two of us in the house.

I did a good thing today. I got on the treadmill. And actually turned it on and WALKED on it.
(for those of you picturing me standing on the treadmill bodly going no where)

I walked for 1/2 a mile. GO ME.
I realized that all the complaining in the world about my diet and what i'm eating
wasn't going to help me lose weight. I actually
have to do something about it. Changing my diet
AND getting on the treadmill every (almost) day should help me
to shed these few extra pounds I'm carrying around with me.
I'd like my clothes to fit better. I managed to walk
almost a mile every day on the beach in Florida, no reason I can't
do the same here... makes sense. In theory at least. I wont get a sunburn on the treadmill, so thats a bonus.
I'll let you know how it goes.

So thanks for stopping in, I am sure I will ramble more again real soon.

I'm I'm

...All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye
But the dawn is breakin',
it's early morn The taxi's waitin',
he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again

Oh, babe, I hate to go I'm ...
There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I'll tell you now, they don't mean a thing
Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back I'll wear your wedding ring

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again

Oh, babe, I hate to go
Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me kiss you
And close your eyes and I'll be on my way
Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
About the times that I won't have to say ...

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go
And I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go
But I'm leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane(Ah ah ah ah)
(Leaving) On a jet plane

If you made it this far I thank you. Consider yourself serenaded? is that even a word. I've been feeling a bit ... quiet the past few days. Forgive me for not blogging. I think I've just been so busy and overloaded that all the thoughts in my head have retreated into the dark recesses of my brain. So I'm going to take those thoughts AND my brain, including the dark recesses and head to Florida for a few days. I'll be back Tuesday.

~miss me? I'll miss you!